'Conversations [Memories] with Tom Petty.'

Originally Posted through Myspace on March 29, 2009 [Wow, almost a year ago. It seems like it just happened yesterday. "So it goes." as Kurt Vonnegut wrote in 'Slaughterhouse-Five']

So, I just got done reading ‘Conversations with Tom Petty;’ a book I bought and started reading in the later part of my Brussels tour / in the midst of listening to the Tom Petty discography a.k.a in the midst of my Tom Petty obsession. This book has been staring at me from my book shelf for probably like 6 months now and I have wanted to get back to it but school and procrastination with things I want to do have just loomed and prevented it. Anyway, I picked it up yesterday in the early morning; I had just finished writing the last essay question to my Continental Philosophy final, which I aced by the way, and I couldn’t fall asleep so I picked up the book and started reading. Now, the funny thing about this is that I put the book down on my typewriter; which sits right under my nose in front of the computer monitor. Anyway, a few hours ago; before I finished the book, I was trying to get to sleep but a line; that was from the book and Tom Petty’s Storytellers show, wouldn’t leave my mind. Tom talks about the song ‘Room at the Top’ from the album Echo and how it is a song about Escapism and to get a rise from the crowd he says the song was originally called ‘Escapism.’

So, here I am laying in the dark with a partial migraine; which I still have, saying this line to myself in as many obscured fashions as I can, to try and figure out where I remember it from. “It’s a book I wrote about Escapism, it’s called ‘Escapism.’” “It’s a story I wrote about Escapism, it’s called ‘Escapism.’” I couldn’t figure out if it was from a House episode, if it was from my readings in Continental Philosophy, or from something else I had been reading; House and Philosophy, Lost and Philosophy, or something on the internet pertaining to my assignments. So, here I am going over all the essay questions I answered for my final; Sartre, and Arednt, as well as past philosophers I covered weeks ago; Nietzsche, Kierkegaard, and ironically enough, I didn’t even think about the Tom Petty book I had been reading yesterday. Here it was sitting right under my nose as I was typing this obscured line about escapism into internet search engines; with fruitless results. Finally, I think I opened up Winamp and started playing a Tom Petty song when I had this questioning epiphany. “Wait, that’s something Tom Petty said, isn’t it?” I should have kicked myself. Here the book was under my nose the whole time and I didn’t think of it. Instead, in my mind I’m going over every little thing I have done in the past week with a fine tooth comb to find where this line came from. Well, then I couldn’t find the damn line in the book, nor could I find it listening through the Storyteller’s tracks in Winamp. So, then I’m questioning the epiphany that I know is right. But, to end a short story I have turned long, I just finished the book. (I have also obviously since found the line in the book I was searching for upon writing this.).

The pertinent issue that invades me at the moment are the feelings and the memories that this particular artist brings me to, and how the dreams and desires I have running around seem so similar or related to things Tom says in the book. I think this may be because his themes are so universal, and to me the music is so vivid, colorful and chalked full of memories. It just takes me back to moments that are so seemingly important.

For one, I have to thank Michelle for ultimately turning me on to Tom Petty even though; funny enough, I didn’t realize or listen to him for another two years or so. So, maybe I just have Michelle to thank for giving meaning via memories to his music. The week our relationship ended was the same week she purchased his Anthology album; which we listened to on the way to a lake in central Oregon. At the same time I remember seeing the colorful artwork to his Highway Companion album which was being sold next to the Anthology album. So, when I see that album or listen to it carries with it the memory of that day we walked through Fred Meyer to pick out the Anthology album, the Mexican place we ate our dinner at, the ride to the lake we spent the day at, and a card game I annoyingly kept singing some of the lyrics from Refugee during.

At that particular time Tom Petty was obviously an artist I had heard, but he wasn’t one I appreciated. I particularly remember a summer of my youth when the song ‘Free Falling’ first came out, and I watched it on MTV with my cousins in Montana. See, living in Bend, OR during the days of my youth we didn’t have MTV and it was something I perceive my folks thought was ridiculous to watch, I even want to say sinful; like some people thought the Simpson’s or Beavis and Butthead were at the time. But, here was Tom Petty’s ‘Free Falling’ music video and it was something I remember my cousins being captivated by.

I think I was in Brussels when I finally started listening to all of his music. And, when I discover music I start to appreciate, I obsess over it. Dwight Yoakum, A-ha, Billy Squier, Bon Jovi, George Harrison and Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers were the heavies for Brussels, that new Eagles Album too; on account of Michelle telling me about it in one of our very last conversations. (Of notable mention: Thank God for Beck in Beijing.) But, it was the plane ride from Beijing that I was really introduced to Tom Petty, now that I think about it. On my return from Beijing, I was on Northwest Airlines. On that particular flight the plane had a television set in the back of every seat. What was great about it was that you could control the content. You could watch movies, play music, or play video games and all of the content was free and on command. If you needed to get up to stretch or go to the bathroom you could pause the content walk away come back to it and start it from where you left off. Anyway, that is where I first listened to the Into the Great Wide Open album. Funny enough, I remember it being so much different from what I know now, not better or worse, just new. Anyway, I love the album artwork on that one too, so unique, just like cover of Highway Companion or Southern Accents.

Anyway, back to Brussels, I really started getting into the guitar, even though the seed was planted in Beijing, and the magic in Tom’s lyrics, and music as well as character were great characteristics for a iconic hero to embody. I remember buying his ‘Running Down a Dream’ documentary and feeling so inspired; and jealous of his musical impact. That was the same time I bought the book I just finished. And, oh how cool was it that the two related. Here, I remember reading things from the book that were talked about in the documentary and felt like I was personally privy to that knowledge as I was reading it. I guess it is a very subjectively personal thing that people hold for certain things in life. I think it is amazing how a song some person wrote and played; which has an individual meaning to them as the performer and creator, can have such a lasting impact on someone who has no relation to the song other than the fact they have listened to it. I’m forced to even think about the elements concerned in the subject matter of the music itself. The story or point of the song could be of no absolute relevance to the moment a person is in when they hear it, but the sound, melody, or the lyrics; while having meaning to the artist and to the song as a work in itself, can have a meaning that is of its own individual subjective significance to a person that hears it. Just thinking about one song, and the various ways it can impact even one person for better or worse is incredible to think about. Just think about one song being broadcast on the radio for millions of people to hear for the first time; as they drive to work in the early hours or work in fields under an unbearable mid day sun. How unimaginably significant does just one song then become even if it only resonates or proves relevant to that moment for five or six of those millions of people? If that song is bound to that moment with just an ounce of the significance a lot of music has in me I find it an unfathomably enormous idea to think about.

The ‘She’s the One’ soundtrack album. In Brussels I remember listening to that album on my rides on the Metro, juxtaposed with Hank Williams Jr. I also listened to that album as I was walking in the early morning to the small PX up the road. Hum… now that I get to thinking about that morning; one that was cold enough to where I could see my breath, I had actually gone out to shot my first roll of Slide film, and ironically enough some of the pictures from that roll hang on my wall. Anyway the significance of that album work into the early morning I stayed up watching the Movie the album was written for. The movie itself wasn’t really anything noteworthy, or seemingly worth having an artist of notable stance to come in to record a soundtrack for. Well, I think Tom’s work on it ultimately added to the merit of the work as a whole and it was a pretty decent movie in comparison to a lot of the garbage out there now a day. Anyway, I remember watching the movie and then watching the music video for whatever song was on the DVD (Probably ‘Walls’ since Tom was under a big top at the Circus, awesome video). About the time the video came to an end was the time I needed to get up and get ready for P.T.. It was a fairly cold morning; and I just hated getting ready for P.T.; it’s like the world might as well come to an end, or it would turn out to be the worst day in the world because it started off with having to spend your early morning running in the cold. But, I was in a certain headspace from the tone of the movie and the music, and just the overall significance I held with the music even then. For that moment I just felt good, irregardless of what lay ahead of me for that day, and this life. I think we actually ended up going out and playing basket ball instead of running. And, ironically enough, Tom Petty’s music is also a part of the memories I have of playing Basketball in Brussels because I would verbally sing Tom Petty’s ‘Swinging’ while we played; also A-ha’s ‘Blood that Moves the Body.’ You know, I can only imagine what the Marines in Brussels thought of me. I was such an asshole in the way I shut myself off from the rest of the detachment, but in moments like those I was actually more a part of the whole than a good deal of the other times. So, much so I would sing while we played basket ball. I bet they thought I was one crazy person. (That particular attitude isn’t something I am proud of, but I know where I was in my life at the time, why I was that way, and the reasons behind why I was that way. Ultimately, I would have been nice had things been different, but I do not regret how things turned out.)

Blah, I could go on and on about each album and the memories I have from them. And, to me each of those albums are just as significant and as detailed as the stories mentioned above. But, now that I have finished the book I took with me to work and read in the middle of many late nights/early mornings at the various Posts in Brussels, I actually feel a little let down the book is over. Those memories; even though they have long been over, now have another official cap to them. I also feel bad that I discovered Tom Petty’s music so late in life, and that Tom Petty is as old as he is now. I have a feeling he won’t be with us much longer and that he won’t have much more music released if there is any; which to me is also a very unfortunate reality to think about. His music has opened so many doors, hopes, dreams and metaphysical hooks to hang memories on that for his music to not continue evolving over the remaining years of my life feels; not unlike the book I just finished, like some sort of story has already come to an end.